Impressing Girls (I need help!)

[deezy]

So there's this girl I like and she doesn't really know I do magic. I think it would be really cool if I impressed her with a trick. Does anyone have suggestions as what to perform? (I'm not really looking for conjuring roses or that sort of thing) Your help will be greatly appreciated.

[MattTarrant]

I cant imagine why anyone would want to go out of their way to try and impress/seduce a girl by knowing a few magic tricks.

Have never used an effect to try and impress a girl, infact most girls I have seen don't even know I am a Magician until quiet a way down the track.

The way I see it, if the girl likes you and you like her - you don't need these 'gimmicks' to try and impress her.

Its like girls who go out of their way to date a DJ, just because he is a DJ.

If she likes your personality, you dont need help mate! Later down the track I am sure she will appreciate seeing some magic, but dont use it as a way to make her fall for you . Just my advice!

[eostresh]

So there's this girl I like and she doesn't really know I do magic. I think it would be really cool if I impressed her with a trick. Does anyone have suggestions as what to perform? (I'm not really looking for conjuring roses or that sort of thing) Your help will be greatly appreciated.

Best advice to impress a girl....get a high paying job and go to the gym.

[ChristopherT]

Best advice to impress a girl....get a high paying job and go to the gym.

Severely misguided advice. Money and muscles can get that initial interest, but if you can't follow that up with a personality then you're just as sunk as before, only now you have a suit and an exercise routine.

The same goes for magic. If you use magic instead of a personality you'll just be a performing monkey. Once you run out of tricks, or once you fail to impress them with a trick, you'll lose all social value. So, my suggestion is just try to talk to her. If you can't hold her interest without magic, you can't hold her interest with it. Once you've built some rapport you can introduce magic and use it to build more interest, but do not fall into the trap of using magic in place of a personality. Or anything else, for that matter.

[deezy]

Thanks for the advice. The girl in question already likes me for other reasons haha. I guess what I'm asking is what affect would you show to a girl in general as a go to move?

[eostresh]

Severely misguided advice. Money and muscles can get that initial interest, but if you can't follow that up with a personality then you're just as sunk as before, only now you have a suit and an exercise routine.

LOL...where did you learn that the Disney channel? Yes my advice was meant to be tongue and cheek but it is scientifically more accurate than the old yarn about "personality." Females are generally attracted to resource and resource holding potential. That means, guys who have "the stuff" and guys who have the means to get "the stuff."
Now most young guys in the courtship stage don't yet have "the stuff<" so it is quite common for males to do conspicuous displays of resource holding potential, a.k.a. proving they can get "the stuff," via the use of plumage, antlers, muscles, and other metabolically expensive "fluff." Here are a few examples.



But with that said, you dolled out some overall good advice. Magic might catch her eye but it won't replace substance. She needs to like you for you. That includes your personality, your ability to take care of yourself, physically and financially, and whatever else you have to offer above and beyond the ability to do a few tricks.

[Steerpike]

LOL...where did you learn that the Disney channel? Yes my advice was meant to be tongue and cheek but it is scientifically more accurate than the old yarn about "personality." Females are generally attracted to resource and resource holding potential. That means, guys who have "the stuff" and guys who have the means to get "the stuff."

Yes... and no. What a lot of guys don't realize is that women look at the things a man does and says and try to interpret what that says about him. For example, do you have six-pack abs and shoulders like a Cadillac? No? Do you look like you take yourself and properly maintain what you have? That works just as well. Do you have 6 figures in the bank? No? Do you display good sense in using what funds you have and can be generous without being frivolous, intelligent without being cheap? That's even better.

What this ultimately comes down to is that if you can't attract a woman without magic, you can't attract her with it.

I knew a guy who's a very talented guitarist. He was already playing Joe Satriani and Dream Theater in high school. He took his acoustic guitar to a party one night at college and set it down to talk to people after drawing a small crowd from playing a fingerstyle remix of the Super Mario Brothers theme. Some guy asked to borrow it. He only knew one Blink-182 riff. It got the attention of a few girls, which was obviously his intention, but when it became clear that one riff was all he had up his sleeve, the girls wandered off to find someone interesting to talk to. Don't be that guy.

[eostresh]

What this ultimately comes down to is that if you can't attract a woman without magic, you can't attract her with it.

That's the quote to take away from all this. If you guys are actually interested in learning a bit about the science of mating strategies I would recommend a course on evolutionary Psychology. If you are not a college type you might check out a few books such as,
"The Evolution of Cooperation" : by Rober Axelrod
"The Evolution of Reciprocal Altruism" By Robert Trivers (appears in "The Quarterly Review of Biology" 1971 or 1972??Can't remember exactly?)
"Sociobiology" by Edward O. Wilson
Those are mostly introductory works...
More specifically you will find a lot of information in,
" The Adapted Mind: Evolutionary psychology and the generation of culture." By John Tooby and Leda Cosmides

There are gobs more out there on the topic but that will get you started. Judging by the responses I would guess that learning a bit about the topic will challenge a lot of preconceived notions.

Incidentally, much as I hate to admit it, the P.U.A. community essentially just takes the principles of evolutionary psychology, strips it down to just the stuff about mating strategies, rewrites it in laymen's terms, and repackages it to lonely guys for exorbitant prices. If you want to save yourself a buck just do a few web-searches. Most academic papers can probably be found and downloaded for free. If not you can find articles discussing the original work that will distill the gist of the information.

[fnord]

Severely misguided advice. Money and muscles can get that initial interest, but if you can't follow that up with a personality then you're just as sunk as before, only now you have a suit and an exercise routine.

In life as in magic, getting a "hook" in is an important first step. You can't get secondary interest and without initial interest. We dress a certain way, we act a certain way, we smile and laugh and present a certain way. A sulky, quiet, haphazard performer could be the best magician in the world, they'd fail. Same in dating. Being above 5'8" (trust me, at 5'6" I notice the difference between sneakers and boots), fit, well dressed, and well spoken, is the best way to get to know people you can then show that you're a good guy. If you don't get that first, five second, win, you'll have an uphill battle you'll lose more often than win.

[ChristopherT]

In life as in magic, getting a "hook" in is an important first step. You can't get secondary interest and without initial interest. We dress a certain way, we act a certain way, we smile and laugh and present a certain way. A sulky, quiet, haphazard performer could be the best magician in the world, they'd fail. Same in dating. Being above 5'8" (trust me, at 5'6" I notice the difference between sneakers and boots), fit, well dressed, and well spoken, is the best way to get to know people you can then show that you're a good guy. If you don't get that first, five second, win, you'll have an uphill battle you'll lose more often than win.

The point I'm trying to make is that the hook doesn't have to be the rubber-stamped corporate image, and in fact many people are turned off by that image because it so frequently comes along with arrogance. Also, people who spend all their time getting fit and working at corporate jobs tend to have nothing to talk about other than lifting weights and working in corporate America.

One of the most charming men I've ever known in my life was a guy that was about 5'7", with a beer gut, balding with a pony tail, usually wore jeans/khakis and a short-sleeved button up shirt, thick glasses, worked at Best Buy and collected toys and other sorts of things. He also was a huge geek/sci-fi enthusiast. Basically, every stereotype that usually works against a guy. But he is f'ing hilarious, and tells stories better than anyone I know. He also has such a wide range of knowledge that he can take part in any conversation and actually contribute. Most of the guys I know that do best with women do not wear suits, do not make tons of money, and do not conform to what society usually terms 'successful.' But they are interesting, funny, considerate, intelligent or a mix thereof.

Now, as a caveat, I do tend to run with an unusual crowd. I seek out artists, musicians and general weirdos. So your mileage may vary.